The Fabulous Terrors are notorious A-holes who think they're better than most everyone else. It's because we are.
With a flair for rabble-rousing, we eat shit and spew doves in four continents not counting the lost island of Atlantis. A cadre of unkempt crackers hellbent on good times - nay, great times - no collective goal motivates us. Fuck, I haven't even seen some of you in years. What in cake are you doing? Making art. Selling drugs. Planting trees. Wearing ties. F'ing indiscriminately. Mating [editor: I personally respect all of those occupations, in order from last to first.]. Some of us wear shirts with sleeves. Others rock homemade haircuts. That doesn't matter. I know that if I holler out a Fab-u-luss, y'all know what's comin next.
Facts:
A) We are not a collective.
2) but a cadre (thank you Teeling).
B) We are not all artists.
C) Some of us work for a living.
w) We are not a bunch of hippies,
x) Except for Goris who is a Champion.
y) We are not bohemians.
z)This group is more depraved than deprived.
3) Y2K killed Wynona Ryder.
7) And we like music.
Ultimately,
!) We are Fabulous mother fucking Terrors, aggressive about our good times.
Let's be real. We were a soccer team. Perhaps the greatest motley crew of stoners and stoners girlfriends to ever whoop serious cake in UVic Intramural Euroball. That is a statement of cool, refreshing fact. Eat it Peg Legs (it's an inside thing. If you don't get it, you're just a groupie. Fact.). We used to drink champizzle before the game then gloat afterwards. We used to hurt people. We smeared a Golden Legacy of Epic Soccertude across an island town of post-grads and pre-deads. Granted they were pushovers. But a true Fabulous Terror has no sense of scope. We are Kings and Queens in our own empires. Even if that empire extends no further than Rompton's family's L-shaped couch.
I get warm when I think of the Terrors. My mind's brown eye recalls gallavanting naked people, drunk on love and booze - a wasteland of Carlo jugs, aluminum cans, and 151 proof - mostly booze. Don't tell me there's some Great Scheme at work here. Cause if you do, I'll show you photos of you naked making a stupid face. Sure we're rad. But we're not Radicals. The Fabulous Terrors don't present some profound challenge to society. We are a part of society, the fun part.
To all Terrors, I'll see you on the pitch.
Dave 'Huub ate my soul' Stansfield
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